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Saturday, November 21, 2009

Stranger in the Mirror (2) - Breaking Free and LIfe Transformation

Previously we talked about the Harsh critical inner dialogues of self doubts many people face. 
We also realised that we need to be aware of them and not let them run our lives, now we continue the journey on how to break free and regain control of our lives...

Breaking Free Creates New Possibility ....

Breaking Free Creates New Possibility ....

Sam is an attorney who is employed by a large, high powered, litigating law firm and he is very unsatisfied with his life. In fact, he has become “depressed”, and feels hopeless.

With his wife and kids accustomed to an affluent lifestyle, he feels as if he is trapped by his job. He sees no escape from his dilemma and beats himself up for even wanting to change his life. He lives all week for the weekends when he can live his dream of having a small scale farm. Yet on Saturday afternoons, he begins to despair that he will have to go to work on Monday.

As he developed the ability to observe the internal dialogue, he also began to realize that these did not have to be the thoughts that controlled his life.

Simply becoming mindful of these two different conversations in his mind – and no longer identifying with them as who he was – gave him a new freedom. He discovered that he could awaken other voices that could contribute to his internal dialogue. H e found a Courageous Self and a Confident Self that, with practice, he could invoke to be part of the internal dialogue in his mind. He also discovered a Divine Voice living within him that (to his amazement) he had never connected to even though he was a practicing Christian.

As he became aware of these aspects of himself (voices within the self), his internal dialogue shifted. He no longer was trapped in a “victim conversation”. Discovering he could call up courageous and confident elements of himself into the thoughts of the internal dialogue created new possibilities for his life. Now, instead of drifting mindlessly in the currents of life, he is moving from being stuck in unseen patterns (comfort zone) to consciously designing the patterns that create his life.

Transforming the Conversations of the Self

This choice, to become a participant in the design of your life is available to all.

What is required is the motivation, skill development, and discipline to learn how to observe the patterns and internal conversations that drive your life and begin consciously developing new patterns and conversations.

As a human being, it is the greatest gift we have been given. The criterion is to recognize that the gift was not designed to serve the Ego. Rather it is built to serve a purpose greater than the self. Our job is to accept the gift, nurture the gift, and to bring forth the light that lives within us into the world.

It is at this moment that we begin the journey to becoming fully human. In the words of Nelson Mandela from his 1984 inaugural speech:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure…. Your playing small does not serve the world…. We are born to make manifest the glory of God within us….. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. We are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

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Being trained in psychology, I hope to share some insights through my blog. May it be a source of daily inspiration for all.